Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of Manboobzers.

Ami Angelwings sat on her bed chewing on a knuckle. She did that when she was angry, depressed or thoughtful. Right now, it was definitely angry. Beside her, on her night table, sat a framed picture of Kirby Warp, her beta-male boyfriend. Or at least she had THOUGHT so.

She glanced at the photo, at his big puppy dog eyes, his cute little eager-to-please smile, and his not-quite-solid-enough-to-demand-anything abs, and screamed. “Arghhhhhhh!”

Things had been going so well too!

Ami’s family had moved to the Chicago suburb of Roissy, Illinois last summer because her dad had lost his job, which meant, naturally, that her mom divorced him and married a wealthy industrialist. Being Asian, Ami’s mother had a longer shelf life than other women, and so even in her late 30s, could still pick up a decent alpha. So, Ami, her mother, and her brother packed up their bags and moved from their busy but beta-filled city in Canada, to the calmer, alpha-filled neighbourhoods of Roissy.

It took Ami a little time to get used to the change. The big houses, the lawns that look like they belonged on a football field, the expensive cars and even more expensive trophy wives… It was just all so much for the 16 year old who had been used to the dirty, hustle and bustle of the big city. Everything was so neatly groomed here, so ornate, so… perfect.

But she got used to it. People were still people. Alphas were still alphas, girls were still girls, and high school was still high school. Even when, on her first day at MBZ High, she got picked on by the cool kids for the way she spoke, and the words she used, she trucked on, implementing the lessons she had learned from her mother and from becoming Queen Bee at her former school. Ami manipulated, and undermined, she identified the Omegas and Betas and used them to do her homework for her, leaving her with more time to spread rumours, gossip and delicious satire of her tormentors. But she always played it clean, with plausible deniability so when Principal Futrelle called her into his office, she could always innocently and (more or less) honestly tell her that “she (or he) started it!” And it had paid off, within a couple of months, she was one of the most, if not the most, popular girl at MBZ high, she had her cute little beta boyfriend, Kirby, who could be used for snuggling, and occasionally other purposes, she had her clique of beta male white knights and alpha bitches, she had everything she could ever want, or need, and more!

And now it was all falling apart!

EoghanAmi grabbed Eoghan, her plush giraffe and held him up, glaring at him. “It’s not fair!” she screamed at him. “It’s not fair! I had him! He’s mine!” Eoghan stared back, blankly. Ami screamed and threw him across the room, knocking over her scented foot oils.

“It’s not fair.” She muttered again, flopping down onto her sheets, hiding her head into her pillow. “Molly’s not even an alpha. She’s fat! That makes her a beta, at MOST. This isn’t fair!” Ami kept her head buried, sobbing slightly. “Not… fair…”

Suddenly, there was a knock on her door. “Ami?”

It was her mom. Ami didn’t move.

“Ami?” Her mother slowly creaked open the door. She peeked her head in, her perfect exotic Asian hair flowing down her shoulders as she did so.

Ami continued to sob. “What?” She finally said.

“Oh Ami.” Amira Angelwings strolled over to her bed and sat down on the edge, careful to not mess up the six thousand dollar skirt she had just seduced the mailman into buying for her. She rested a perfectly manicured hand on her daughter’s back. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Go away.”

But Amira knew that it was not nothing. She glanced over to Ami’s night stand and saw the picture of Kirby, and knew. “Oh honey, did you lose your beta?”

Ami didn’t answer, but Amira knew she was right. “Oh darling, I’m so sorry. But there will be others. Who did you lose him to?” She stroked her daughter’s long blonde hair gently, soothing her.

“M..ol…ly R..en.” Ami was so ashamed she could barely choke out the name.

Suddenly the hair stroking stopped. Amira stood up stiffly. “That hippo!? You lost a beta male to some fatty!?”

Ami sobbed harder. “I know mom. I don’t know what I did wrong! I followed all the rules! I did everything you told me to! But there’s this new girl, and she’s… more of a queen bee than I am. Her name’s even Bee! And everything’s being screwed up, and… now I saw Kirby giving his lunch money to her… and… I don’t know!” She banged her head in frustration on her pillow.

Understanding now, Amira sat back down, steadying herself. “I think I understand honey. Bee’s a feminist, isn’t she?” Ami nodded into her pillow. Amira sighed. “This is what feminists do honey, they mess up the natural order of things, and there’s nothing more natural than high school. It’ll be okay darling, it absolutely will be. You’ll get him back, and you’ll get back at the Hippo and her Bee friend… feminism can only get them so far, and you’re just so pretty and young. Sometimes, I hate you too, and not just in the usual way mothers are jealous of their young daughters.”

For the first time since her mother came into the room, Ami felt hope. She lifted her head out of her pillow and wiped the tears from her eyes. “Really?”

Her mother smiled at her. “Really. You’re an Angelwings, and we always find ways to fly. Just look at me, over thirty and still able to get an Alpha to provide and slave for us. Here, why don’t we go out to dinner, and we’ll talk about your problem some more. There’s this great new place that just opened. It’s very elite and expensive but the owner has a thing for young Asian girls. Just make sure you wear that tight dress I bought you yesterday, and we’ll get in no problem.” Amira smiled at her daughter once more and walked out of the room.

Ami stared into space. Her mom was right. This wasn’t over! She had only begun to fight! If these bitches… no… BEE-tches wanted to mess with Ami Angelwings, they were about to see what that really meant! She got up off her bed, dried her eyes and picked up her picture of Kirby. “They’ll have no idea what hit them.”

~BY Ami Angelwings

About cloudiah

I contain platitudes.
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